My test is today at 4.30 pm.

And nothing is going inside my head!!

Mind you, its 100% weightage!

It's either do or die.

7 November, please come soon!

No matter how irritating or annoying you can be,

No matter how much you like to add charcoal to my fire

No matter how unromantic and tak-tau-pujuk a boyfriend you can be

And no matter how many times you can call me boncit or gemuk which you know I hate

I still do *cough, cough* love you.

You know, you are too lucky to have me this way.

I'm totally different this time.

I've been craving for sarabat cheese buns since last week.

And still do, every single night.

Cheese buns..

I was telling my boyfriend about the "honeymoon" period.

I was saying that our "honeymoon" period is lasting much more than my other previous relationships.

I mean, totally.

We are almost into half a year, but we act like as if we are a month into it.

You know, the malu-malu, the mushy-mushy, the manja-manja.

Ok, you get the picture.

I mean, comparing our relationship with friends of a year plus,

the sparks are like gone.

Its filled with hostility, stiffness and dim.

Some were even rude to each other, to the extent of profanities.

And that scares me.

Are we going to end up like that?

I'm hoping our "honeymoon" period never ends.

Because I can't imagine us being that way.

Friday's outing was our last Raya thing, to end it with.

Of course, my secondary school mates.

Even though there were a few of us, like 7.

Still, tell me, no matter how often or how few there may be,

we were still immatured as ever.

Maybe the atmosphere was filled with rubbish, and laughters from the girls.

Pictures at every 6 houses.

Formal plus crazy.

haha.

Maybe that common phrase was true,

"The best moments of your life were high school old times."

We were supposed to meet at 5pm but as per normal, "janji2 melayu sume".

We started at 6.30pm.

Simei, Tampines, Ubi

6 houses, till midnight.

Fast??

The goodness of cars.

By midnight, most were tired and off straight home for sleep.

Work continued on a Saturday morning.

Tasha's

Fik's

Sue's

Dee's

Mahir's

Tisa's




Them..

The end

ok!!

let me talk about my friend can??

There was this friend of mine whom I hated or maybe, disliked alot back in secondary school.

I disliked the way she hang around guys, how she flirted with some of them and how she boast on her outings with them sometimes.

She was the outcast among us, getting pushed around in different cliques.

From my perspective, it was that bad.

After secondary school, I realised she was not that bad..

She was interesting, outgoing and happy go lucky.

Until now, she is still a good friend of mine.

Even though she was a bit screw loose up there.

Who is she??

Tada!!

This is her, dancing for me.

10 minutes ago..

She's cute, isnt she?

I find it silly of me to be heartbroken at little things like that.

I wanted to know what had happened, and I know who the characters were in the story.

But with him, just recalling it, like as if it was fresh from his mind, like as if it happened just yesterday, like as if he treasured those beginning moments 3 years ago.

I simply said, "Stop. It's hurting me."

And I broke down.

Now, I am starting to believe these horoscope/zodiac thing.

Cancers are just pure sensitive and too worried about things. Paranoia, I mean.

Too many things have happened!!

Which means I have many to blog about..

I just realised that blogging really help to reminisce the memories.

I was scrolling back to my archives and I was laughing myself silly to all my craps and crazy antics.

Haha!!

I just realised that I am still as kental as before when I was back in Secondary and Poly days.

Firstly about Raya..

Its coming to an end already.

Lets just post about it for memories sake.

Primary School Kids.

My pupils came on 2 occasions! How nice to see all of them again.

Of course I miss them la. Especially Syafiq and Aniqah!

The ones who will come to me when they are feeling dissatisfied with things in school or personal life.

My table was always open for social talk.

And Ismail's loyar burukness actually made him tersembur air klua.

Laugh too much for the whole 2 hours they were here.

Oooo.. Lovey2..

And yes, their phrase that made my day, "Miss Suhaila teacher paling best. Ajar maths very fun!"

Oh, ade ke tak aku gembira buat malam tu.

Hehe

My Girls Clan!

Then my girls came to my house!

Haha, due to unforeseen, last minute project meeting I could not join them so..

They came!

My Jannah, Siti and Mari!

And few days later, we went to Mrs Marican's house!

407 jalan Raya.

We had our jalan Raya together!!

And it was so awkward nak mamps.

Next time, we should just stop the passing-the-parcel relationship.

I just hated the way we are interconnected with our ex and friends.

And there were too many gossips for the day, we should stop that too!

But nonetheless, we, girls had fun even though the boys were room hopping for smoking at every house.

EdPsych Meeting

We also had our so called edpsych meeting.

With Nani driving, we went to Hajah Maimunah for "Brunch" and ordered like lots of food.

After thatm we shopped at bugis and in the end to East Coast for our discusion by the beach.

But instead of psychology stuff, we chit-chatted sampai mahgrib without discussion.

We said, "We did our psychology discussion - sexual/relationship psychology!"

Btul, btul, btul!

My Hang outs with Them

2 occasions.

One conclusion:

I love them for their expertise on stuff and thanks for teaching the kental Sue stuff I don't need to know.

Him: Deknie suke paranoid ah!

Aah, takpe, lain kali you bilang je la I nie orang nye paranoid ok?

Of course, I have to be paranoid!

If I'm not, and suddenly things happen suddenly, I'm the one at loss what!

Si ge-dey-bab nie!

Hmmph!!

And sesungguhnye I learnt so much about my ugama today.

I had a minah tudung close friend, a step-alim boyfriend and an Arab descendant friend around me.

The talk about Kiamat, the meaning of kahwin and nikah and haha, jin.

Yes, jin.

Plus an intricate explanation of the guli, which ended with..

"Dosa seh! Tuhan dah kasi, dorang nak modify2.."

Where?

Bawah blok, mlm2 buta.

And amazingly, my mum could hear our laughters.

"Memekak je malam2 buta ketawa2."

Mesti ah, with these kind of friends, they make you laugh non-stop la!

And FID!!! Congratulations!! All the best ok??

The suhaila I know has too wild an imagination when it comes to relationship.

I guess because Suhaila just seems to lose her confidence in this kind of matter due to a really long and tough failed relationship and some other playing-your-feelings ones.

But I guess she is trying her one last bit in this one and hoping things does work out as the way she wants it.

She knows this one has to go a pretty long way before it can really, really, really stand strong.

And she also knows that she should stop thinking as much as she can before those thoughts breaks her totally.



Well, maybe I was thinking too much but I can't help it.

She loves him too much I guess.

Maybe she is unable to let him go just yet.

Or maybe she had something up her sleeve.

And it had to happen on the day I met her too.

Oh dammit!

In his words, "Why can't we have a peaceful relationship with no one to go in between??"

Aku so jealous lah..

Because the moment I stepped on Boon Lay interchange grounds, I see baju kurungs and songkoks and kebayas and labuci.

Ever since Raya..

And here I am stuck between school and home, tunggu orang dtg raya.

Sungguh boring!

And its like the first year where all my Raya mood is gone oleh kerana assignments, presentations, project meetings and practically, superordinately, SCHOOL!!

And aku so jealous that the Malay Language students went jalan raya today after solat jumaat and there I was stuck at Tutorial Room 29, for my English class.

I was telling my boyfriend,

If seriously, I have no jalan raya dates with any of my friends this year, kite jalan raya berdua dua la.

Pergi attack rumah sanak saudara and kawan-kawan terdekat!

Hehe..

And seriously, aku benci dengan si BABI TUA whom I met on the train today. so irritating and complainy! I feel like smacking her face and gagged her mouth with my lap-lantai-punye-cloth.

One last thing, I've been recently surrounded by people who is getting engaged or hitched soon at a pretty young age. Actually, around my era. I really wonder sometimes, where do they find the guts or that need in themselves to get hitched that soon??

Because I am pretty much not willing to give up these few years of my life yet. For all I know, I am not yet ready to be taking care of my husband, my parents in law and a baby at hand. Plus a household to handle. I was thinking, if I were to get married so soon, where should I put my career?? On top of my head?? What will happen to my bond which will last another 4 years? School??

And I don't even know how to cook!!

My mother was talking to me the other day. She gave me 5 years to prepare myself to settle down because she said I am too immature, childish and too ignorant of stuff.

Haha!!

Yes, my mother knows me well.

Its gonna be hard this month to be seeing and making dates with each other.

Since he will be on night shift for a month and its exam period for me plus the big percentage presentations..

4 weeks str8 for both of us!!

So mornings from 8am to 11am will be our perfect time slots almost everytime.

So that Saturday morning, I woke up like 7 am in the morning, pick him up from work (Thank God it was at Bedok!) and airport for MacDonalds Breakfast.

And yes, we are not Breakfast people because I can't really get my fat ass off the bed early in the morning. But after his consistent menyibuk phonecalls early that morning, I gave up.

And seriously, who goes to the airport early in the morning for Breakfast?

The Sunday morning was the same drill. Except it was Bedok's Mee Rebus, Nasi Ayam and Egg Prata for the family back at home.

And Today! Zam zam for really late dinner!

I needed that for my mentally tired brain after whole day in school!

And I seriously need a touch from him to survive for next one week.

And if you think this entry is too very picturistic, I'm sorry.

For his and my own ease to save me all the trouble to send him the pictures.

Just for him to copy and paste.

And you all whom I msged, Thank you so much eh.

Next Year Tahun Raye Cine baru korang reply la ok.. Hmmph!!

I seriously like need alot of patience just writing this entry down.

Knowing me, I AM NOT a patient kind of girl, so if I'm giving you pictures all halfway,

Maaf Zahir dan Batin.


My last 2 days of Puasa : 2nd last day

Breaking of fast with the Besties.

It was the first time, we seoul garden-ed together, per say by Mal.

And yes, seoul garden-ing was fun.

Cooking, BBQ-ing, slamming all the meat and seafood down.

The whole trip was complete with the talks, jokes, chills and of course,

It wouldn't be complete without..

STARBUCKS!


My last 2 days of Puasa : Malam Raya

I was tired because I was from school.

And the boyfriend was working night shift, IMAGINE THAT!

So after school was Geylang for last minute shopping.

His songkok and the food.

We actually queued up for that Burger Satay which was a total disappointment.

And of course, my donuts!

After which, back to my home for Buka.

Amazingly we were early and I managed a nap on that clean, shiny sofa which I scrubbed the night before.

Because I know I can't or specifically, won't be able to sleep that night.

My part time job: 'Mother helper'

Food was a spread and things happened after.

That "Takbir" has that effect every single year.

It was emotional, yes.

Hari Raya

Sesungguhnya, the first day I was sick!

We had the "Maaf Zahir dan Batin" thing.

And it was my house for the gathering this year.

So busy, busy, busy!!

My face was so busuk and there were so many people.

The picture with many2 people was only 50% of my relatives.
The other 50, in my house.

The house was filled and food was a lot!

And I mean, A lot! the Periuk-periuk kind of alot!

Nenek's house as tetamu terakhir after Isyak.

And sleep, Suhaila, sleep thereafter.

Today

Jalan Raya with the Family.

8 houses! I repeat, 8 houses.

Within these 8 houses, I learnt alot of things.

For example, I am a new auntie to..

AQIL ZOHRI.

And I have a cute nephew.

Who can sing well and calls me well.

"Kala Su, Kala Su.."

By the way, Kala means auntie.

Due to that thick Bengali blood that flows under my malay-coloured skin veins.

And I look cute when I was a toddler.

Haha!

That's all.

Let the pictures tell it all.




Ah, yes.. I rebonded my hair.

ha ha ha ha uh uh uh ee ee ee urgh!

I miss my curls!!